With the recent news of Walter Herrmann’s departure to Spain it makes sense now to unveil the Walter Herrmann rhyme I’ve been hoarding all to myself for the last few weeks. My previous rhymes about NBA players can be found here.

But first, the

Corny But True Story

I’ve always loved my pets and have always loved sports, especially hoops. Me being a lonely only child, I consider the household pets I’ve lived with to be my siblings.  My first word was the name of the family dog at the time.  It seems like I’ve always had a critter at the foot of my bed to keep my feet warm.  I’ve even trained for long distance races with a few of my dogs.  I taught one of my cats to walk on a leash (not true).  True dog and cat people will understand– the critters can be integral parts of the family if you wish them to be.

Basketball started becoming important to me right before news from my mom that the household would be welcoming in a new kitten.  There was just enough time between when my hoop fandom started kicking in and when we were supposed to pick out a kitten to familiarize myself with a decent amount of NBA player’s names.  I really got into the NBA pretty heavily. At least as heavily as a youngster can anyway. And then this idea came to me: start naming new pets after NBA players. I thought my idea was brilliant and cool—basically legendary. I was only 8 at the time.

Understandably mom didn’t think that my naming idea was brilliant at all. She probably thought I’d want to name the kitten Jordan or Malone or something.  But in the end she agreed to let me name it whatever I wanted as long as the name fit.  Well, the name I came up with (and it stuck) for the little 12 week old female kitten was Penny, you know, after Anfernee “Penny” Hardaway. Ingenious, right?  A couple years later we got a sidekick for Penny. This time it was a male kitten.  I named him Murray, after former journeyman Tracy Murray. Bet you haven’t seen that name in awhile.

Would you believe me if I told you that my cat's name has evolved from Penny to Pennyjoe?

But being that canines are my favorite furry critter of all, naming a pup after a pro baller was a pretty special stuff. The special jet black male lab, chow, shepard mix we first called ours in 2000 would be known as Reggie, after one of my favorite NBA’ers of all time, Reggie Miller.

Just a short time ago in 2008 I got another opportunity to throw my weight around and name a pup after a baller. This guy was a beagle, rat terrier mix. Cute little devil. The initial shy stage most dogs and pups go through at their new residences last anywhere from a few days to even a week or two. Well, this little mutt would have none of that.  He was dominating the household agenda by the evening of day one– prancing around like he owned the joint, challenging our only other dog (who was six times the weight of the pup at the time- a rescue dog that already had a name) to constant wrestling matches, terrorizing lil’ Penny, and attempting but hilariously failing hundreds of times to jump on the furniture. Good times.

The unfortunate part about this is that I had named him Walter, after Walter Herrmann, surely one of the humblest, grounded athletes around.  Certainly no correlation to the newest furry addition to the household.  It’s like naming a Dachshund, Diesel– or better yet an Irish Wolfhound, Buttercup. Of course, the name did settle in nicely and I can’t imagine calling him anything else.  Besides ‘satan’.

Looks can be deceiving

The Man

I, like many Pistons fans, found it difficult not to enjoy Mr. Herrmann and everything he brought to the court. There’s an innocent charm and mystery about Herrmann that tugs at your innermost curiosity. The big hands, the ponytail hairdo and the animated foreign flair would be enough to draw even the most casual NBA observer to his corner, not to mention the most ardent ‘know almost every player in the league’ type fans. But I’d reckon Herrmann’s tragic 2003 nightmare of losing his mother, younger sister, and fiancée in a car accident gives fans the most righteous perspective of who he is and what he has accomplished.  I certainly hope so.  The dude is the real deal.

The Herrmann Rhyme

some don’t notice both sets of double consonants in his surname

or fathom the unorthodoxly artful manner he plays the game,

he’s just too rare not to embrace

nothing a sane being can just simply efface

when he’s not flailing his arms in the corner

the D’s crowd favorite token foreigner, (not any more, Jonas step right up)

he’s swooping towards the hoop under noses

makings moves even Dr. J opposes

his lackluster stay in the D was lame

though the coaching carousal was part to blame,

his flavor was just not the right fit

that was the word he had to admit

some just come and go without a sound

just a byline never to be found,

it’s with a foggy disgust I somehow plea

all is well with those that are free

FREEP-  Jonny Flynn of Syracuse had a rather fun and laid back visit with Joe D and company.

FREEP (Vince Ellis’ blog) - Virginia Commonwealth point guard Eric Maynor is saying all the right stuff about the Pistons.

New York Post (Via FREEP) -  Peter Vescey says Carlos Boozer will either be playing for the Nets or the Pistons next season. 

Full Court Press-  Dave Dial posted Hasheem Thabeet’s and Eric Maynor’s interview videos from Draft Express.

PistonsNation- Where You At Rip? Boost Mobile video.

Via Motown String Music- Walter Herrmann might be leaving the NBA for Spain.

-But I’ve heard conflicting reports. Anyways, this is obviously not a big deal for the Pistons, but for the fans, it is.  I have loved the guy from day one and was actually a fan of him back when he played for Charlotte. Walter is definitely an NBA caliber talent, just not the most conventional one, or rather, not what most NBA teams are looking for in a dependable backup. 

- A comment on the Free Press article about the possible departure had me laughing, out loud:  “does this mean there are no more finga rolls from da free throw line?”

-If Walter does in fact depart the NBA I will concoct a poem about him, similar to these I’ve written about past and present NBA ballers. Scratch that, I’m gonna write it anyways.

Need4Sheed- Very neat Alex Acker video from May 21st.  Acker seems like a real down to earth guy and hopefully he can stick in the league for a long time.

Hardwood Paroxysm (h/t Piston Powered)- Mad Max is the most selfish Piston according to HP’s formula.

NBA Fanhouse-  Ben Wallace contemplating retirement.  Wallace is and always will be my favorite Piston of all time.

NBA Playoffs 2009 Tumblr- LeBron James on his backside.

Silver Screen and Roll-  Birdman got some moves.

Curse Of Cleveland-  “I’m not going to dwell much on stats from Game 6, because let’s face the music. You don’t have to look at too many stats from this series to show that the Magic dominated it. They won in six games, stole Game 1 on the Cavaliers’ homecourt where they were 44-2 at that point, and would have swept the Cavaliers if not for the best shot of LeBron James’s amazing career.”

Denver Stiffs- “I didn’t quite grasp how emotionally and physically exhausted I was having followed the Nuggets so closely since October until I sat down on the couch to watch Saturday night’s Magic/Cavaliers game. I was fighting back the eyelids from shutting throughout the first half, eventually caved into my exhaustion and didn’t wake up until “Law & Order” or whatever the hell they put on TNT late night was on. I had to watch ESPN’s “NBA Fastbreak” just to see the highlights of the Cavs‘ embarrassing series finale implosion and LeBron James classless exit. ”

Third Quarter Collapse- “Dwight Howard stepped up to the plate last night and played, arguably, the best game of his young NBA career – 40 points, 14 rebounds, 4 assists, 1 block. Cleveland had no answer for Superman, as he dominated single-coverage and punished double & triple teams throughout the evening. Truly an epic performance.”

Via Hail Mary Jane - “No Kobe/LeBron Final…Sorry Everyone”

” I wonder if they will remake this puppet commercials with Dwight Howard instead of LeBron.”