F-E-L-O-N-I-O-U-S

Big Ben is back in Detroit for at least one more year.

I’ll stick by my previous comments on this matter.  No need to rehash them.

With Joe D. clearly off his rocker, I wonder what other players he might resort to signing…

 

Other former Pistons with little to nothing left in the tank that Joe might want to sign

Chucky Atkins- 34 year old Kenneth Lavon Atkins is currently a free agent (not exactly, he’s currently on the T-Wolves but what’s the difference).  Yeah, he could help tutor Stuckey and Bynum or something, you know, take a roster spot from a younger player with potential such as a Sean Singletary or Jeremy Pargo.

Michael Curry- I hear he still has that wicked good set jump shot and can still throw down the hammer every once in a while.  You do realize Joe, the team needs an experienced backup small forward.  Wouldn’t want Mr. Summers to get any PT his rookie season, would ya?  And if nothing else, maybe Curry can give some pointers to the  rooks because after all, he was a helluva decision maker as a coach.  Make Rip come off the bench.  Brilliant! Plus Mike gave the most articulate and shrewd postgame interviews I’ve seen.  Ever.

Scot Pollard- Guy is still looking for work and can still churn out the most unbelievable hairdos known to man kind.  Hey Joe, the team is still a bit thin in the front court, Scot just might be the secret drug!

Jon Barry-  Still looks like he could ignite a fourth quarter rally or two.  In case Bill Bydon goes down with an injury, Jon could be signed mid-season to be our bench savior.  Or not, as Jon’s got a pretty nice gig as a T.V. analyst now.

Corliss Williamson- Big Nasty is just 35 years old!  I bet he could teach Kwame some better offensive moves, or better yet, show him how to play with attitude.  Corliss would be great for Jonas too. A few months under Corliss’s wing and Jonas Jerebko will be a low post scoring beast!

Always keep an open mind Joe!

 

In all seriousness though..

I think the question all Pistons fans want to know is this:

If things get chippy between Wallace and the coach, and maybe the season is not going so smoothly, will Ben refuse to enter the game in garbage time? 

And if Ben does happen to play a few meaningful minutes here and there, will he demand a certain amount of touches?

I hope I’m wrong and Ben (my favorite all-time Piston I might add) has something left in the tank  he can offer to this team.  But over the last year and a half I’ve seen an injury prone dude completely wither away.  He’s nothing like the old Big Ben, except for that offensive game and free throw shooting, still as sad as ever.

Old and slow Ben to Detroit, hooray!

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  • Corey

    Corliss is only 35? Man, puts things in perspective.

    I don’t think Ben will have any problems with Coach, after all they were in the same city last year.

  • http://manifestoognothing.wordpress.com Jonathan

    Toasterhands, I love you, but your rampant Ben Wallace negativity is out of control!

    In context, is this really *that* bad of a signing? He’s a vet minimum player at worst coming off the bench as the 5th big. And given that he just had a semi-respectable season starting for the team with the league’s best record pre-BROKEN LEG, is Ben actually worse than all of the other 11th men in this league? That’s the price Detroit got him for.

    Most end-of-the-bench players are there as big insurance or a teacher and don’t see playing time. He’s the equivalent of a 2006 Dale Davis/Elden Campbell.

    And given that Ben is (a) generally known as a decent guy and come to Detroit with is tail somewhat between his legs and (b) Kuester was his assistant last year in Cleveland and during Ben’s much loved Larry Brown era in Detroit, his causing trouble is highly unlikely.

  • http://lifeondumars.com/ toasterhands

    In context, no, this is not that bad of a signing.

    But I’m already getting sick of hearing how EXCITED everybody is. Do they all realize he’s nothing he once was?

    It’s bothering me.

    I guess I’ll start outlining a post where I describe how I once was in love with the man, and no, I did not name a pet after him.

    Don’t want to give the wrong impression that I despise the man, favorite Piston of all time for me, as I’ve said before on LoD.

  • http://manifestoognothing.wordpress.com Jonathan

    I think people are mostly getting excited because it’s an excuse to feel nostalgic. Seeing the core dismantled has been hard on us romantics.

    But any great expectations are foolish. Agreed.

  • Corey

    Will Ben regrow the fro to hark back to his championship days?

    In all seriousness though, it’d be super rad if Ben could play the role of Elden, but even in Elden’s last days, he could drain a baseline jumper or a hook in the low post which Ben probably can’t do. But, like the above commenter said, what else is out there?

  • http://hardwoodhoudini.com Tung

    Hell, add Isiah to the list. Somehow the dude still looks like he is 15.
    He’s still a pervert like a 15 year old, too.

    Joe D should give Lindsay Hunter a call (I think he just re-signed with Chicago, but I’m sure Hunter and Bulls would he happy parting ways for Hunter to make a comeback tour with the Detroit).

    I like the Charlie V pick-up, and also the Ben Gordon pick-up. I think Gordon is the guy that will be the 6th man. All that dude wants is money and a coach that will let him just make and take his own shots all day long. In the 2nd unit, he can certainly do that.

    Great post!

  • toasterhands

    I should have made the list to ten, oh well.

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